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~alwayswishing

Courtney
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About Me Member Angsty Poet alwayswishing20/Female/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 1 Year
Needs Premium Membership Statistics 86 Deviations
168 Comments
1,062 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

Knowledge vs. InnocenceThe peaceful aroma of the leaves in autumn  Reminds me of the hope I once felt long ago  The innocence of my youth had not yet  Been trampled on by hooves of reality  
 
But being the misunderstood child I was,  I searched tenaciously for meaning in life  And by doing so, I unknowingly began  To lose sight of the wonder of my surroundings   
Being "deep" can only take one so far  
We can't forget what is right in front of us  Because while hunting down our purpose  It's so easy to miss our shot at a fulfilling life   
Sometimes I wish to return to those simple days &nb Knowledge vs. Innocence
by ~alwayswishing
Whispers of TruthYou tremble as I whisper  The words you dread to hear  I can see the devastation in your eyes  Hear the fear in your breath   
Were you expecting me to continue  Down the road of lies which brought us here?  The most important thing to me now  Is no longer you   
The time of falsehood has ended  I will no longer partake of  That sickening communion you always offered  My life is mine, not yours   
As my blunt honesty sinks in,  I'm already walking out the door  I will never look back  On the deceptive life I led before Whispers of Truth
by ~alwayswishing
Eyes Wide OpenI was taught to never doubt you  To acknowledge my sin and repent  Because if I didn't follow your rules  You would lovingly send me to Hell   
The threat of eternal damnation  Is one any person would fear  But to a child, so young and naïve  It leads to destruction of self   
So many years I spent hating myself  Because I was not worthy,  Not holy enough for your love  I began to wonder what was truth   
But asking questions is against the rules  One must blindly follow your word  In order to be called a true believer  What was I to think?  &n Eyes Wide Open
by ~alwayswishing
Mind GamesPretending you care is the way  You draw people into your games  Full of manipulation and deceit  Oh when will you learn?   
You gobble up the lives  
Of the people around you  Who are only trying to help  Because you crave attention   
Why must you deceive the ones  Who are the most faithful?  Why must you leave us in the dust,  While you search for a new victim?   
Letting you control my mind  Is no longer the choice I make  You are a stranger to me now  I've lost the kind person I once knew Mind Games
by ~alwayswishing
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!!The New Me!!

Tue Jan 19, 2010, 12:20 AM
  • Mood: Zest
  • Listening to: YUI - Summer Song (Acoustic Version)
I'm so happy with myself. I've been doing so well. No longer depressed or suicidal. Planning to go back to school soon. I have so much more self-confidence. I've never really had good self-esteem. But now I'm able to accept and love myself. I cherish my life. It's just such an amazing feeling, especially since I've never really experienced it before. Most of my life I spent hating myself. But things have really turned around. I'm so much better. I've become much more rational/logical a person. Whereas before I was pretty much a "feeler" all the way. I'm just really grateful to be alive. I'm going to make the most out of this life. Things are really looking up. :)

- Courtney <3

2 Comments | Previous Journal Entries

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Devious Info

  • Current Residence: In my head
  • Interests: Languages and world cultures. Music. Poetry. Love.
  • Favourite band or musician: Paramore, Missy Higgins, Imogen Heap, The Killers, Vanessa Carlton
  • Favourite genre of music: I like almost everything. I love J-pop.
  • Favourite poet or writer: Sylvia Plath, Sara Teasdale and Carla ;)
  • Operating System: Vista
  • Favourite cartoon character: Too hard to pick
  • Personal Quote: "Gimme yo' wallet!" :P

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Comments


:iconpatriciad:
~PatriciaD Jan 27, 2010, 3:02:37 PM
thanks a lot for the fav!

--
[link]

manchmal sind die dinge gar nicht so, wie man sichs vorgestellt hat, sondern besser.
:iconoll01:
~oll01 Jan 12, 2010, 8:48:50 AM
thank you for the fav :hug:
:iconinvisable2evry1:
~InViSaBlE2EvRy1 Dec 19, 2009, 2:17:10 PM
Thank you for the :+fav:!!! :aww:

--
I went to the book store earlier to buy a 'Where's Waldo' book. When I got there, I couldn't find the book anywhere. Well played Waldo, well played...
:iconlife-takers-crayons:
=Life-takers-crayons Dec 1, 2009, 1:24:08 AM
Cheers also for the watch :)

--
My Mistaken Art page [link]
Don't forget to check my tunes[link]
And my scraps[link]

Thanks.
:iconlife-takers-crayons:
=Life-takers-crayons Dec 1, 2009, 12:57:37 AM
Thank you so much for the fav :)

--
My Mistaken Art page [link]
Don't forget to check my tunes[link]
And my scraps[link]

Thanks.
:iconjiecess:
~Jiecess Nov 30, 2009, 11:13:53 PM
Hi,.. Terima Kasih :hug: (Thankssssss) for faving. I`m really appreciate it.

have a nice day ya..

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SAVE PALESTINE!
:iconinvisable2evry1:
~InViSaBlE2EvRy1 Nov 30, 2009, 10:56:41 PM
Thank you for the :+fav:!!! I'm glad you liked it!! =)

--
I went to the book store earlier to buy a 'Where's Waldo' book. When I got there, I couldn't find the book anywhere. Well played Waldo, well played...
:iconsadakox:
~SadakoX Nov 30, 2009, 10:53:38 PM
Thank you very much for adding [link] to your fav :D

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Reina for President ;)
:iconosap:
~OsaP Nov 29, 2009, 8:10:08 PM
YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

*loves on you*

--
"Well let me tell you why, if I did marry bacon I would soon be jailed for frying up and devouring my yummy bacon spouse."
~subject of an e-mail XD
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